The gorge-yourself-until-you’re-happily-uncomfortable season officially begins tonight (although last weekend was a doozie)! Halloween is the one time you get to play your alter ego and get rewarded for it in candy and booze. And while I’m sadly far past the age of door-to-door begging, I was offended to learn that some cities are actually making it illegal for kids over a certain age to trick-or-treat. A lot of the reasoning for the trick-or-treating age laws is based on the fact that teenagers dressed in little kid costumes are a bit spooky–and the “I’m a sexy (insert inanimate object here” trend has spiraled out of control. No one wants to see they’re neighbors’ kid walking around as a Sexy Hamburger.
My favorite rationale came from the mayor of Belleville, IL:
“When I was a kid my father said to me, ‘You’re too damn big to be going trick-or-treating. You’re done.’ When that doesn’t happen, then that’s reason for the city governments to intervene.”
Thank God the government’s stepping in to keep the youth of America on the right track.
Old, young, clever, or just plain ol’ slutty, I hope you have a fun and candy-filled Halloween. Because if you’re going to end up in jail for anything, it should be that you’re too old to be dressed as Honey Boo Boo.